[NEVER look away]

A distraught father had to rush to his hometown because of a family crisis: his son, 18 years young, took his own life & was found dead at home. This came as a shock especially to the father since the last time he got in touch with his son was just days before & he wasn't aware of anything that might have bothered him.

The father is someone that hubby & I personally know. He is an engineer based in Manila while his family is in the province somewhere in the Visayas. His wife, as far as I know, stayed at home. So, what went wrong? I suppose the boy was in a serious dilemma but either his parents were too busy to notice or care about it or the boy just wasn't close to his parents, enough to confide in them.

This comes to mind a recent heart-to-heart talk with a daughter. I found her in tears & asked her why. She then poured her heart out about the concerns that have been stressing her out. I began to cry myself affected by what she's been going through, something that I wasn't even aware of all this time I was with her. I thought it best that my hubby join me in the talk so I led her to where her dad was. She then told us how the pressures of schoolwork have gotten into her. We then told her to go easy on herself & just  do  things as they come. She has so many fears & insecurities but we reminded her of how she was able to surpass all the difficulties she faced before because of prayers & hard work. After our talk, we saw & felt how comforted she became after she unburdened her problems to us. What if she found no one to turn to & confide in? Or she found someone but ill-advised her?



This is one of the many reasons why I opted to stop working & stay home with my girls. I once read that one never stops being a parent. For me, the early childhood years & teen years are most crucial because of brain & behavioral developments & more so, for the latter because of peer pressure, among other issues. Although, I am hats-off to those who are able to juggle work & family, I think there will really come a time for any parent, a mother most especially, who will choose to be with her children & raise them herself rather than regret the lost time spent with them & see her children all-messed up in their lives. 

In the years that I have been with my girls, I have felt our closeness. They are comfortable telling us almost anything. In fact, until now, they are sleeping with us in our room. My husband once quipped, "hangga't di nag-aasawa yang mga yan, tanggapin  na natin na roommates na natin sila. Sayang talaga yung pinagawa kong mga kwarto nila. Pa-upa na lang kaya natin..." (As long as they are not yet married, let us just accept the fact that they will still be our roommates for a number of years to come. I think we're better off renting out  their rooms, building them felt like a waste of money & time...) Of course, he was just kidding... ;)

After knowing about that suicide incident, all the more Julius & I resolved that we would continue to be hands-on in raising our girls in the best way possible. We would never put off listening to them every time, no matter how busy we become. We would NEVER look away & dismiss any concerns they may have though how trivial they seem to be.  Better to do it the right way, make some sacrifices than be sorry & live with regrets. After all, the girls, for us, are more important.

To know more about teen depression & other parenting tips on raising teens, going here might help.